I sleep a lot lately.
Far more than I have in years and years. Maybe I’m just getting old. Or finally catching up on all the sleep I hadn’t gotten for years – or maybe I just really appreciate the luxuriousness of a long sleep or stolen nap. It simply feels decadent to curl up on the couch mid-afternoon or stay in bed until quite late.
I have a great bed. It’s more than 30 years old, as is the mattress, and at a time when it’s more than far overdue for replacement it instead becomes more comfortable by the year. Go figure. With two mattress pads, wonderful 1,200-thread count sheets and cozy blankets, is it any wonder that I don’t want to leave it?
For many years, I felt like I could never find the right pillow. Now that I have not just one, but two, that I absolutely love, I find myself taking one along when I travel and a favorite blanket, too. No matter where I am, I have the feel of home and the comfort I’ve grown to love. It still leaves room to enjoy whatever I encounter, but I’ve got a backup plan just in case.
And because I’m sleeping more, I’m dreaming more; or at least remembering my dreams in ways I don’t necessarily a good deal of the time. Usually the ones I remember in more recent years have been stress-related dreams, and I can identify those readily by the subject matter. You know the ones, in which you wake up and wonder if it really happened and what precipitated such a tense dream? It’s usually not hard to tell – and those sorts of dreams are great ways to identify the stress in our lives and hopefully do what we can to resolve it.
I’ve had a rather interesting occurrence in a couple of dreams lately, which once upon a time might have indicated major stress and yet this time around it’s certainly not. It’s an odd one, but twice within the last month I’ve had a dream in which I’ve been naked in everyday circumstances in public (not anything, truly, I’d ever want to do or subject others to, mind you).
Most dream interpretations would see this as a vulnerable position, something triggering embarrassment, shamefulness or allowing others to see faults in some capacity. Yet, in both of these dreams, there was nothing like that. It wasn’t like I was somehow showcasing myself, but rather that I was just going about life as if this was totally cool and nothing to give a second thought.
The first dream didn’t really hit home at all. I remember just thinking, “Hmmm…that’s odd.” I didn’t really give it a second thought. After the second – and different – dream happened this past week, it gave me pause. What message was this conveying to me? I came to this: Perhaps it’s acceptance of myself and who I am, that I’m not afraid to be vulnerable, to allow people to see me – flaws and all – and see that’s just who I am. And it’s enough, which is why I feel such ease both in the dream and when I wake up.
So I guess all this sleep is a pretty good thing – in fact, it may even be naptime once again.
Pamme Boutselis 