How a Family Grows

Just a month ago today, the dynamic of our family shifted ever so slightly as we welcomed a most darling little boy to our world. So few days really, when you consider the length of a month in what will be a lifetime of amazing moments, yet it has seemed as if he has been with us for much longer—and every moment thus far has been pretty darn special.

On January 22^nd, my daughter gave birth to little Logan*, and while I knew she and her husband would be excellent parents, they somehow seemed to shift almost effortlessly into their new role. It’s hard to imagine that they haven’t done this for a very long time as well. And while just a month ago, this lovely child had barely been born, he easily became the central focus not only for his parents, but for two very excited immediate families, and a wealth of extended friends-like-family and beyond.

The love that we feel for Logan has already enriched our lives immeasurably—and this is how a family grows.

It doesn’t just grow in numbers, but in caring; caring not only for each other, and all who become a part of our family, but those connected as well with each in our family. We were so fortunate to have both of the new parents’ families—almost everyone—right there at the hospital for the birth, able to share in the before moments, the long wait during a C-section moments, and the wonderful after moments.

Although I’m divorced and my former husband lives in a long-term care facility, we ensured he was there to greet his first grandchild. One son was there throughout, and another joined us as soon as he got out of class at a nearby university. My oldest was traveling for work, devastated that he wasn’t able to be with us at the hospital. His first stop after flying home several days later was directly to meet his nephew. My daughter’s in-laws were also with us, and their daughter, too. Her young brothers-in-law would visit the next day. This is a first grandchild all around, and while we have already bonded through a wedding shower, a wedding, family occasions, and preparing for this birth, Logan’s arrival gave us an even deeper connection at his birth and will continue to we as share in every milestone and the special moments in his life going forward. We are blessed.

When I learned I would be a grandmother, I couldn’t quite comprehend what this might be like. It boggled my mind that my little girl would have a child of her own; although she’s far beyond the age I was when I had my first child. The eyes of friends who were already grandparents would sparkle upon hearing the news that I would soon be in their league—“Just you wait, it’s the most wonderful thing in the world,” they’d say. And while I suspected it certainly would be, I am still wrapping my head around this marvelous thing.

What no one tells you is this—suddenly this little person is in your world and from the moment you meet, you realize it’s someone you already know. That tiny face belongs to his father really, even the newborn frown you recognize, though you hadn’t quite seen it on his dad before. When that baby holds tightly on your finger the very first time you hold him, you know his touch and are sure that you would never let any harm come to him in any way. You’d fight fire for this little guy and any danger that could even possibly head toward him. And then there’s his smell—it transports you back to holding your own babies, especially his mother. You remember her snuggling up and see her sweet little baby mouth and chin transported somehow into this newborn child. When you hold him, every care in your world will melt away, no matter what kind of day you might have had. It’s like magic and you can’t help but recognize just how special it really is. And no one has told you because they can’t possibly tell you what it will be like. You have to feel it for yourself.

A month later—this is what I know to be true. Each day brings something new and amazing, even the slightest thing. My daughter sends me several “daily Logans” (as I call them) each day, photos that she texts me and I text-harass her when she doesn’t (“Excuse me, I haven’t received a daily Logan yet today). And in the middle of the day, I look at the newest picture, regardless of where I am or whom I am with (and my work colleagues have been especially kind and patient with me on this note and so many others), and my day just brightens. In the past few days as his eyes widen and stay open more, suddenly his mother’s smiling eyes seem to be replicated in his tiny face and he’s become this fascinating amalgam of both of his parents.  He’s this amazing bit of magic that I am entranced by.

Logan is a precious little boy, who sleeps well, is content and smiley, and he is so well cared for by his parents, who are over-the-moon in love with him. He has great-grandparents, grandparents, an aunt, five uncles, great aunts and uncles and so many family members and friends in his corner. He is surrounded by so much love. I wish every child could be this fortunate. And as we all share in this wonderful experience, building on relationships and care already in place, we grow as a family in extraordinary ways.

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*The term ‘little’ is relative; Logan was 11 lbs. 3 oz. and 22 inches at birth, clearly necessitating a C-section the day after his actual size was discovered via an ultrasound, much to everyone’s surprise.